Find your voice

Have you ever sat in a meeting & had some valuable insights but didn't speak up?
Is the word Yes coming out of your mouth when you really mean No?
Do you allow others to make decisions for you so that you don't ruffle any feathers?

When you do this, you dis-empower yourself. You are saying that you are not worthy. Your thoughts and opinions are not good enough to be heard. By saying Yes when you mean No, you are not congruent with your beliefs, mission or values, instead you are in conflict. Allowing others to make decisions for you takes away your control of where you truly want to head in your life and yet, conveniently it can also have the payoff of not taking responsibility for your actions, which we know is a cop out.

I remember hearing the saying "Speak the truth even if your voice shakes" and this powerful message is a good one. Yes, there may be times where you tell the white lie to make someone feel good "No honey, your butt doesn't look too big in those jeans", but what about when you have something important to say and you keep suppressing it. Let me tell you, you are doing not only yourself injustice but the world.

We all see the world in our own unique way because of the diverse experiences that we have had together with how we filter information. Your opinion counts. Your insights count. You saying No & backing yourself counts. You deserve to be the Strong Leader in your own life.
How boring would the world be if we all agreed on everything and saw everything in the same light.
You owe it to others around you to be able to challenge thinking & expand each others minds.

It's been said that if you haven't had someone not like you at some point then you haven't stood for anything.
Stand up for You. Share your true self and allow the expression of your views expand how others see the world & be open to being challenged as this is how you grow.
Find Your Voice & Inspire others to find theirs.

Mind your own business

I remember as a child watching Bewitched on tv and laughing at the nosy neighbour that was always immersing herself in what was happening across the road. We are all addicted at some level to drama. It is a natural human behaviour however we need to ensure that we fulfill this need in a resourceful and sustainable way. Be mindful of the boundaries of other peoples lives.

When I first started going out with my now husband, the question people asked me was, "When are you getting married?" Then after we got married it was "When are you going to have a baby?" Then after the birth of my son the question was "When are you having another baby?"
It didn't bother me at the time with most people but then you would come across some individuals that would really put the pressure on, it would feel as though they had the spotlight on you & an interrogation was in progress.

We are inquisitive human beings and we naturally crave knowing about other peoples worlds. It is important to always remember that it is their life, their belief system & their journey to take. Now I'm not saying that you can't guide and support your loved ones but there is a fine line. If people are in danger then of course you can choose to intervene however most of the time we need to step back, let them make their own decisions & allow them to learn from any mistakes they make along the way. We need to learn to listen more & talk less.

Now this may press a few buttons for some of you.
Your son has broken up with his wife. Give support, guidance & love and "Mind your own business."
A friend tells you that another friend has put on 10kg & is ready for a gossip fest. Zip it up and "Mind your own business."
The neighbours daughter has left school at 15. Be there as a sounding board if they need you and "Mind your own business."

Make yourself available for people but refrain from judgement & unsolicited advice. When you come from a place of love & non judgement, you will be surprised how people will be drawn to you and then ask you for support.
Refuse to involve yourself in water cooler gossip. When you feel that urge of excitement, when some saucy news is told & you want to give your 5 cents worth remember, mind your own business, look after your own backyard and focus on more acceptance & less judgement.

Be an adult - Take Responsibility

Have you ever not got back to somebody because you didn't have the courage to say what you know that you needed to say? It's like, let me sweep this under the carpet, pretend it is not there and eventually it will go away. Well, guess what, the situation may go away at the time but what won't go away is your inability to step up and take responsibility for your life.

As a child, you may have told the white lie to get out of trouble, blamed the dog or knew that by throwing a tantrum you can get what you want. It may have worked for you at the time but guess what, you are not a child anymore. 

I remember a long time ago, I met a Director who offered me a role in his business. It is a fantastic Icon Brand and I was excited by what I could bring to the company. It had come down to the discussion of salary and that is where he was feeling uncomfortable. I asked him to come back to me with an offer. Then nothing. No phone call, no email and no return communication when contacted. 

Now, he may have not been able to afford me or too uncertain of an offer to put forward, I have no idea to this day. What I do know is that he did not step up and take responsibility & unfortunately is known for it in his networks. 

The thing is, that feeling is always there, you know the feeling where your actions don't sit well with your values. It doesn't go away. You keep avoiding taking responsibility and you feel it in your gut. It doesn't feel right. You think that you are avoiding pain but you are enhancing it.

Be true to yourself. Have those challenging conversations even when you are fearful. Stand up to your responsibilities and be transparent with your communication & values. Hiding behind an invisible shield of avoidance shows people what level of responsibility you are willing to take on and therefore how much trust they can have in you.

The results that you achieve in your life is You. The great results, that's You. The crap results, yep that's You. The Actions & Non Actions, yes that is You. When you step up and own your behaviour, it is an evolution of learning. Best of all, you are true to yourself & people will respect you for it.

Dream

When faced with a serious situation that can challenge you in life, it can feel like a tug of war between reality & hope. The narrow minded path that you can direct your focus, may create a perceived reality that is limited & in turn, you may have a false sense of feeling like there is a lack of choice.

The meaning of hope can simply mean having the courage to back yourself in any situation, whatever the end outcome may be. Knowing that you have all of the resources inside of you to handle anything that comes your way, is empowering. Have you ever heard people say that they didn't know how strong they were until they were truly tested? By knowing that you have this inner strength to tap into at any time and that your reality is only your perception, what possibilities does this open your mind up to?

Practice questioning your perceptions & allow yourself the ability to be creative with your thoughts, so you can expand your thinking and push through any limiting barriers that may be holding you back.
Sometimes the right side of our brain where our logic sits, gets in the way of what is truly possible.
Give yourself permission to dream because it is the dreamers who can see options that others may not.